They’re All Winging It

If you could go back in time and give your younger self advice, what would it be?

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The one thing that I now realize all these decades later is that no one really knows what they’re doing. Okay, a few people had a plan and worked that plan. But more often than not, people—at all levels and in all positions—have gotten where they are by making it up as they go along, figuring it out in the moments, and even lying that they knew what they were doing and had experience just to get the job. 

All my life, I thought everybody got it but me. And, of course, on some level, I was right about that. In school, it was obvious who understood and who didn’t. But even then, it wasn’t that obvious, because my grades had people fooled that I had a clue. I didn’t. I was fighting for my life, teaching MYSELF because I couldn’t understand in school. I was cramming for tests because the in class instructions were over my head. I was my own teacher and never knew what was going on in my classes. And nobody knew, apparently not even my teachers. 

Over the years, I’ve asked people in all walks of life, at all levels, if they always had it together. And most of them have told me, they are just winging it, that nobody really knows what they’re doing, that everyone is just acting like they’ve got it together. 

So if I had one thing I could tell you, it would be to stop comparing yourself to others. Become very clear on who you are, what matters to you, what you do well, and what you enjoy doing. Then be that, do that, and care about that. Do your best in any given moment. And know that your best will change from moment to moment, so give yourself grace. And most importantly don’t judge yourself by those around you. It seems like we’re in a race, but it’s more like an expressway. We’re side by side, moving forward on our individual journeys. Don’t worry about the other lanes. Do you. Be you. Enjoy your own journey. 

Blessings,

Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist 

Screaming for Peace

Lately, my body’s been aching
Parts of me screaming and begging
For peace, there’s no mistaking

I can’t tell you how I know
It’s just something internal
Just like that thing in moms
That inner maternal

Of late I feel real strong
That this pain is not real
Hmmm… it’s real but not true
Like trapped thoughts I can feel

A knowing that if I can simply release
Old shame and old blame
And old hurts
I feel peace

You can call it hunch
Or that I’m just out my mind
But the knowing’s so real
It’s just a matter of time

That if I don’t listen and lose them
That thoughts that cause pain
Stop rehearsing hurt stories
Again and again

That these uncomfortable aches
And difficulties moving
Will be my new life
And there’s no undoing

It’s time to release them
And reclaim my ease
To let go of these thoughts
Before they’re disease

To forgive and release
If I can’t quite forget
To let go of life’s lessons
Where I missed what they meant

To untell the stories
I’ve told to myself
That left me believing
In my decreased wealth

The meanings I made up
That that’s all I get
That no one will want me
They’ll leave once we’ve met

I’m too much or too little
Not quite the right match
That despite all I whittle
I’m just not a catch

That because of my brain
I’ll never succeed
Forever gifted and broke
Though I push and I plead

That the way I’ve been loved
Won’t get any better
Discarded once used
Like a warm ugly sweater

That despite all I bring
My needs are too much
People give to those who have
But for me “let’s go dutch.”

That Murphy’s Law
Should be Marlene’s instead
So I must worry, live in angst
Overthink and plan ahead

That I must barely sleep
To succeed at life at all
To live like you is freedom
For if I rest I’ll drop the ball

Gotta make up for my make up
Brain’s unkind so eff the rest
Work ’round Mother Nature’s cursing
To pretend I still feel blessed

Sleep’s for suckers
Grind ’til daybreak
Drink some caffeine
You’ll be fine

Gotta burn that midnight oil
Team no sleep
Stay on your grind

Recognizing all that’s bullsh*t
Why my body screams and cries
Fighting natural to be like them
While my body slowly dies

Yeah, I’m over it
Just accepting I don’t fit
In this grind world

Gotta travel back to center
Learn to love
My inner girl

Make the time
To make me happy
And let the others
Do their thing

Stop chasing people
Who don’t love me
They’re unworthy
Of the cling

Notice those
Who truly see me
Elevate their rank above

Release the need
For those unworthy
Those who never show me love

See all I bring so clearly
See my good above my bad
Know that I was always worthy
And the best they ever had

Know that some mistreat
Good things
When they don’t know
The price

But expensive
Is still expensive
Even if
It’s not treated nice

I don’t have to claim
“Unworthy”
Because they missed
My worth

Despite my childhood
Or my friendships
Or how I was treated
Since birth

People confuse trash
And uniqueness
When they value those
Who get in line

Outliers called problems
Instead of priceless
Because we use
Our minds

Learned daily the cost
For stepping outside the box
Slowly receiving my flowers
As they’ve stopped throwing rocks

But regardless of them
Gotta love me
‘Cuz they can change their minds

Gotta be cool
With me as me
‘Cuz I’m with me all the time

Learning to love
What I’ve hated
Learning to accept
What can’t change

My brain is my brain
Can’t debate it
But gonna try meds
To get it in range

Letting go of the fear
That back holds me
Doing what I can
When I can

Releasing those who’d
Want to control me
No more contorting myself
To keep a man

Letting go of
All that they told me
Their lies
That became my truth

Done adjusting myself
Making pretty
To catch the Boaz
To match with my Ruth

Eyerolling at
All of the nonsense
I’ve followed
In my search for peace

Had no idea
I’ve always been worthy
No need to hide
Cover, fake it, or reach

Me, as me,
Is my best self
I don’t need to
Be any other

No more feeling
Unworthy and not enough
Despite the words of my mother. 🤣

Just venting. Another journaling poem that finds it’s own rhythm, shifting and sifting through my thoughts. Unedited. Stream of consciousness (primarily). Just let it flow…

Anywho, thanks for being here.

Blessings!

Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist

Check out my most recent posts here.

Maybe There’s Hope

In this season of uncertainty, yesterday’s events really mattered. Even though my situation hasn’t changed, some glimmers of hope showed up that shifted me from being certainty to curiosity.

Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist’s quote: “Sometimes right at the brink of giving up you find some glimmers of hope.” appears in large, bold white lettering with a dark shadow over a dramatic blue sky filled with clouds and golden sunlight streaming through them. Her name appears in white script at the top, with @marlenedillonempowerment beneath the quote, the Share & Let’s Live! podcast logo in the lower-right corner, and MDILLONDESIGNS.COM/BLOG along the bottom
Tap the play button to listen to today’s podcast. Tap & hold first if necessary, then tap play.
FYI I cuss so wait ’til the kids and elders aren’t around. Press play to listen to today’s podcast. Blessings!

I was honestly heading down a path of no longer believing life could improve for me. But after these moments I share on today’s podcast, I’m thinking maybe things can actually work out for me.

Please check out today’s podcast above to hear the story.


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I Just Want to Be Me

“Inspiration has always been my deepest motivation.”
— Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist

On this episode of Share & Let’s Live! I came to a truly defining realization about myself while I was recording.

Tap the play button to listen to today’s podcast. Tap & hold first if necessary, then tap play
FYI I cuss so wait ’til the kids and elders aren’t around. Press play to listen to today’s podcast. Blessings!

I have been pretty candid about my increasing financial challenges as I navigate extreme burnout as a neurodivergent human. Today I discovered something interesting that I’d like to share. I believe it may provide you some insights about yourself or someone you care about.

A quick FYI…

On today’s podcast, multiple times I mention explaining things in the description (which is actually yesterday’s blog post). At the time of the recording, I planned to share today’s podcast episode with yesterday’s blog post as the description. However, since the post ended up being so long, I decided it was better to let the two stand alone.

So above you’ll find the podcast episode. If you’d like to read the description, I mention on today’s podcast, find it here, it’s yesterday’s blog post, “Who I Was Who I Am.”

Thanks for being here. Press play above to hear today’s podcast.

Oh, almost forgot the special treat! 🤣Please listen all the way to the end if you want to hear the most I-can’t-believe-what-I-just-witnessed story that took place while I was recording. 🤣 (Make sure you’re not eating. Just trust me.)😂