Tap the play button to listen to today’s podcast. Tap & hold first if necessary, then tap play.Press play to listen to today’s podcast. FYI I cuss so wait ’til the kids and elders aren’t around. Blessings!
We ask ourselves the wrong questions. We ask ourselves questions that lead toward insecurities, that lead to panic, and that cause us to be intimidated to make necessary moves.
Questions that don’t serve us, like: “What if (fill in scary, unwanted possibility) happens?” “What’s wrong with me?” “How will I know how to (fill in step 10 when you’re still at step 0 in your grand idea)?”
It’s important that we learn how to ask questions that: we can actually answer and that lead us in positive directions. Two questions that fit that description are: “What do I need to do next?” AND “What would I have to believe to feel the way I’m feeling right now?”
I asked the latter earlier today and it helped me transition out of a state of panic. Not only did it help me make forward moves, it also helped me recognize the deeper story that led to the panic… something rooted in childhood.
I share about this on today’s podcast. Check it out.
On my blog and Share & Let’s Live! podcast, I share tips and tools that are transforming my life and mindset every single day. If you appreciate this FREE daily blog/podcast (and are able), please consider sending a tip via Buymeacoffee. It’s a great way to support without breaking the bank. (No pressure, of course. If you’re unable, please know I understand.)
Thank you so much for being here! Thank you for reading and listening. And double thank you for liking, commenting, and subscribing! It means so much to me that you’re connecting with what I share. 🥰
I’m a huge proponent of positive thinking… AND… I know that sometimes it’s easier said than done.
Tap the play button or use the links below to listen on your favorite app.Press play to listen to today’s podcast. FYI I cuss so wait ’til the kids and elders aren’t around. Blessings!
Today, I tried something new. I was stuck in a moment of anxiety. I couldn’t get myself to stop worrying by trying to be positive and visualize positive things. So when I couldn’t get to happy, I just decided to try being neutral. Not angry, not happy, not negative, or positive. I just allowed myself to be blank. And it actually worked. I calmed me down.
I share about this today on the podcast. A little warning, I was having some technical challenges so the episode is not as long as intended. I think I did a good enough job of editing it though.
On my blog and Share & Let’s Live! podcast, I share tips and tools that are transforming my life and mindset every single day. If you appreciate this FREE daily blog/podcast (and are able), please consider sending a tip via Buymeacoffee. It’s a great way to support without breaking the bank. (No pressure, of course. If you’re unable, please know I understand.)
Thank you so much for being here! Thank you for reading and listening. And double thank you for liking, commenting, and subscribing! It means so much to me that you’re connecting with what I share. 🥰
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I am ADHDing like an emmeffer today 😂 so I’m sharing two things….
Tap the play button or use the links below to listen on your favorite app.Press play to listen to today’s podcast. FYI I cuss so wait ’til the kids and elders aren’t around. Blessings!
A few days ago, this epiphany/insight/odd ass analogy came to me regarding relationships and situationships. It’s kinda deep. Thought I’d share that. (That’s the test drive part.)
Then, today, I had a wild (not quite that wild) series of events that I thought would be a great glimpse into the life of someone with ADHD. So I’m sharing that, too.
If you listen to podcast first, it’ll make more sense, AND it’s not required (since I just explained it). You’ll miss the ADHD story, though (that’s exclusively on the podcast). So do what works for you. Enjoy!
Just a Test Drive
So I was at the sink washing my face and I started thinking about this idea.
Imagine that you work at a luxury sports car dealership and your coworker sees a potential buyer walk in. They walk over and introduce themselves and the customer from jump says, they’re just looking and and aren’t interested in buying anything right now. Your coworker assures them that their intentions are understood. They continue to walk and talk and after a while your coworker asks if they’d still “like to take it for a test drive?” The customer agrees, knowing it will probably be fun, and reminds your coworker that they’re still not looking to buy. Understood, they go for a test drive.
The ride was awesome. The customer was a really great driver. They both had a great time chatting while the customer took the car for a spin. The customer thanks your coworker and leaves.
About a week later, your coworker calls the same customer in and asks if they’d like to do another test drive. They feel pretty certain that the customer was giving off, “I wanna buy this car” vibes. The customer happens to have a free schedule that day so they say, “Why not?” They come by and drive the car again. They both enjoy the ride. Great conversation. Your coworker is so certain this will turn into a sale that they start to let the customer do their errands during test drives. Their thought is that the more comfortable they are doing normal day-to-day life things with the car, the more likely they’re gonna buy that car.
Clearly the customer is warming up to the idea. I mean, otherwise, why would they keep coming in again and again to drive the car?
After a few weeks of these test drives, your coworker is getting frustrated, wondering when they’re going buy the car. I mean, they can’t just keep driving this car around town and not ever pay for it.
So finally the frustration sets in and they confront the customer and ask, “Why do you keep test driving this car? When are you planning to buy it?” The customer looks at them confused and says, “I told you from the beginning, I wasn’t interested in getting a car right now.” Your coworker is furious. They feel used and like the customer took advantage. But the customer was clear about their intentions from the beginning. They just chose to enjoy the benefits that were being freely offered to them.
This is often what happens with situationships. One person is very clear on their intentions. Often, in the beginning, both people are okay with the temporary nature of things. Then, as more time is spent, one person starts to catch feelings and see the relationship as more than it is. But something seems to be missing on the other person’s end. They’re not making it clear that they are committed, although they are present and spending time. Well, they’re not committed, because they said from the beginning, that’s not what they’re about.
They stuck to their intentions that they were clear about from the beginning. They enjoyed those benefits that were being freely offered, but their intentions never changed.
I share this analogy because I’ve been the one giving out the test drives for so long that I was certain that we were on the same page. Everything looked like it was heading toward a commitment, or even that one was already there, but we never discussed a change in what was happening. We never said that we were shifting from a situation to a relationship. I made all that up in my mind because of what it looked like and what it felt like, and even what words were being said.
What I have learned from multiple painful misunderstandings is that if you did not have a real conversation where both of you established that this is now a committed monogamous relationship, you may be in that relationship by yourself. If you’re having to ask, “So what are we?” You already have your answer. It’s a situationship. If a shift has really happened, it will be clear, and communicated. You deserve that clarity. And if they stick with the original plan, that you all discussed, are they wrong?
On my blog and Share & Let’s Live! podcast, I share tips and tools that are transforming my life and mindset every single day. If you appreciate this FREE daily blog/podcast (and are able), please consider sending a tip via Buymeacoffee. It’s a great way to support without breaking the bank. (No pressure, of course. If you’re unable, please know I understand.)
Thank you so much for being here! Thank you for reading and listening. And double thank you for liking, commenting, and subscribing! It means so much to me that you’re connecting with what I share. 🥰
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When it comes to friendship, do you value quantity over quality? Do you have friends that are VIPs because of the years and the history, even though y’all just don’t match anymore?
Tap the play button or use the links below to listen on your favorite app.Press play to listen to today’s podcast. FYI I cuss so wait ’til the kids and elders aren’t around. Blessings!
That’s the kind of stuff of tackled on today’s episode of Share & Let’s Live! with Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist.
This month is about rewiring… letting go of what doesn’t serve us, shifting the way we do things to match where we are and where we’re heading. If your friendships primarily have years but no substance, if the people you vibe with most are those you’ve met more recently, if you’ve got some people you know are down for you, but you still haven’t given them VIP status…. this podcast episode is for you.
On my blog and Share & Let’s Live! podcast, I share tips and tools that are transforming my life and mindset every single day. If you appreciate this FREE daily blog/podcast (and are able), please consider sending a tip via Buymeacoffee. It’s a great way to support without breaking the bank. (No pressure, of course. If you’re unable, please know I understand.)
Thank you so much for being here! Thank you for reading and listening. And double thank you for liking, commenting, and subscribing! It means so much to me that you’re connecting with what I share. 🥰
Get My Parenting Course Over 30% OFF! Limited Time Offer
Want a discount on my online communication course for parents? Use the link/button below to get it today. This is a LIMITED TIME offer. Use Code: HEALMYFAM5
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