Our experiences of life are colored by our beliefs. What we think moments mean determines how we feel, react, and respond.
Two people can go to a dolphin show. One person gets splashed with water and their day is ruined. Another gets splashed and the moment is epic. (And I guess we can add a third for one who’s appalled that the dolphins are in captivity.) Point is… same event, different experiences of it. And it’s all based on beliefs.
We all have various beliefs streaming in the background of our minds. For some of us, they are loud and intrusive, while for others they may be primarily inaudible. Volume aside, they exist.
These beliefs are like colored lenses between us and events. Our “lenses” are colored by life moments AND the meanings we place on those moments. For example, you’re a happy kid, enjoying your ice cream, town bully runs by, says, “Hey, Dork,” and smacks it out of your hand. Your response to this moment will depend on the meaning (the story you tell yourself about why what happened occurred) you place on this event. You may decide, “That guy is the real dork,” shake your head and go buy another one. Or you may decide, “I am not safe in this town,” and run home crying and refuse to leave ever again because, “People can do bad things to me at any time.” Or you may keep replaying the moment of bliss and wonder seconds before the event followed by the deep gut wrenching pain of the loss, causing you to say, “I will never enjoy ice cream again because someone can just take it away from me. I HATE ICE CREAM!”
As we go through life, we develop these “if then” statements. Using the example above, the first response could be based on the idea that “If someone is mean, then that’s on them. It has nothing to do with me.” The second way could be, “If one bad thing happens, then that means a million other bad things can happen.” And the third could be “If I don’t want to experience deep pain, then I should avoid things I love because I may lose them.”
On today’s podcast, I share a story about how I trained myself to stop claiming sickness each time I experienced symptoms. And how I am retraining myself to stop placing meanings on things unnecessarily. It’s possible to cough without having a cold. It’s possible to sneeze without having allergies. And it’s possible to have a bad experience, without concluding that bad things always happen to you. Get it?
Well, I explain it better on today’s podcast.
Check it out. I hope that it is helpful (or at least entertaining) for you.
Blessings!
Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist
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