“We’ve gotta teach our children their worth so they don’t settle. And that’s not just with our words, but our actions.” —Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist
It’s more than what we say, and drilling thoughts into their minds. “You’re beautiful, you’re smart, you’re a leader.” It has a lot to do with how we TREAT them.
If you tell your child all day that they’re important, but you treat them like an inconvenience, which lesson do you think they’re really learning? We often say that “actions speak louder than words,” but we don’t apply this to our children.
Everytime they enter the room, we’re annoyed. That’s not teaching them they are valuable. It’s teaching them that they are an annoyance and in the way. We spend money on them, and we won’t let them forget it. It’s not teaching them that they are worth it, it’s teaching them the opposite.
The want to share a story with us (and maybe that biotch is long as eff), and we are rolling our eyes and doing the universal sign for “get on with it,” and think that they are going to learn that they are worth somebody’s time.
We don’t realize how much our body language impacts our children and their sense of self-worth. We don’t realize how our facial expressions teach them more about who they are and how the world sees them than our words ever do.
I don’t know why, but this message was urgent to flow from me… better yet, through me.
If you have a child that is not connecting with you, I hate to tell you but YOU might be the reason. Their attitude problem, might actually be a YOU problem.
It’s not about blame, but about bother….. Meaning, it’s about time that you start to think about how your actions—sh*t, my actions, too, because I’m a parent… raising a teen daughter—how OUR actions, even the ones we don’t think about are COMMUNICATING to our children ALL. THE. TIME.
We can be the BEST parent… in our own opinion. We buy them the best of the best. We enroll them in the best of the best. We invest in them. But if we don’t treat them like we like them, we are missing the most important part.
Children learn how to love and what love feels like from us. Our interactions teach them how people will treat them and how they are to treat others. If we don’t pay attention to how our body language is impacting our kids, we’ve missed the mark. And it doesn’t stop there.
They are watching how we treat others…. how we talk about others… how we react and respond to others. They are watching how we treat OURSELVES. We are CONSTANTLY teaching them.
As I speak of this, it’s making me not only CHECK myself as a parent. It’s also making me think about what I want to cover in my upcoming course for parents of TEENS/TWEENS.
Y’all pray for me ,because you know I got ADHD and these great ideas come to me but it’s hard to herd these thoughts in my mind and get all the way to a finished product. Day-to-day life take a lot when your mind is so active so please keep me in your thoughts as I put this together…. AND….
My current course, Healing Our Families: Healing the Parent-Child Relationship, covers most of this. The new course will cover some deeper avenues that are specific to teens and tweens, but I cover verbal and nonverbal communication THOROUGHLY in my current course. You can look at it as an introductory communication course for parents.
The lessons you learn there will serve you VERY well with a child of any age. You will learn what to say, what not to say, and how your body language is saying way more than you think. I’ll teach you to pay attention to how you’re communicating. And I’ll teach you how to reconnect when your relationship with your child is not so good.
Most rifts in relationships are due to communication errors. So the cool thing about my course is the deeper lessons, we cover in 6 lessons, are transferable to other relationships. These communication skills will work for work relationships, friendships and intimate relationships.
So don’t just wait for the new course (because #ADHDbelike and I cannot tell you when that’s gonna drop). Get the current course now and you’ll be the first to know when I drop the new one.
Anywho, I hope this blessed you. If it did, please share it and tell people about the course (current and upcoming, actually would be great).
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Blessings!
Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist
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