Transitioning Through the Tough Stuff

Anybody else been having C+ days, lately? Gotta love ourselves through them. Ebb and flow doesn’t just apply to the ocean. We’re 70% water, too. Some days we’re A+ and some days we’re not. We have to love ourselves in every state….

Photo of beautiful turquoise waters with foaming tide coming in onto clean beige sand. Text in turquoise all caps states Give yourself more love on the days when your best effort is a C+.  Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist mdillondesigns.com

“Life for me ain’t been no crystal stair.”

Langston Hughes

About once a week, those words from Langston Hughes’ poem, “Mother to Son” come to mind. It’s a beautiful poem of a mother telling her son to not give up, that despite the challenges of life, she’s still persevering, and he can, too.

The last two days, I’ve been listening to Toni Braxton’s “Let It Flow” on repeat. It’s not because I’m on the brink of a break up. (I’m still team single over here. 😆) It’s because I need to remind myself that it’s okay to not be in control all the time. I need to let things flow and, honestly, be less uptight.

I am admittedly experiencing one of the most challenging seasons of my adult life. I’m not going through a terminal illness or anything like that. I’m just processing life, with multiple aspects under construction. I am building my dream, while navigating my right now. Some days that can be exhausting.

Despite being a little too aware of what I want to change, I am more determined than I’ve ever been to pursue my dreams. So the dance between optimism and pessimism sometimes leaves me feeling emotional, exhausted, and honestly wondering if things will ever be REALLY good.

As an empowerment specialist, this is a weird thing to admit. However, I feel that my honesty serves, too. I don’t have it all together. I’m navigating life, too. What I’ve learned is that my lessons along this journey have value. As I learn, I share.

Inspiration comes to me that helps me navigate my moments. Most of my posts came from insights I receive intuitively—guidance from “all there is” that helps me make sense of where I am right now.

I get so excited about having instructions on how to navigate that moment, that the majority of my posts were written within minutes of receiving that guidance. I can recognize truth when it comes to me. I’m wise enough to know that it didn’t come from me because seconds before I was clueless having no idea what to do. I’ve been practicing listening to divine guidance since high school so I eagerly share it because I know it will be helpful not just to me, but to you, too. And it has been. (I love receiving your messages and comments about how my posts inspired you. They inspired me, too, lol. Thanks Universe! 😆)

Anywho, I wrote this post to share with you what I do to transition and keep going on the days that feel hard….

Quick sidebar: Before someone calls me out on discouraging people from “feeling the feelings,” I am just sharing what I do. These may resonate with people who process similarly to me. I believe that everyone processes life differently, due to personality, upbringing, environmental factors, societal conditioning, zodiac signs, human designs, past/present trauma, and so much more. I think that SOME people who are more comfortable emoting can be a bit judgy toward those who aren’t. I happen to be one who deals better with processing the less comfortable emotions in the company of a therapist, rather than in my own space. But that’s me. I respect everyone’s right to heal and deal differently. So there’s that….

Okay. So here are some of the things I do to keep moving forward when I feel like I’m being b*tch slapped by life. 😆

❤️💜💙💚 JOURNAL – I write in my journal. I don’t just vent. Sometimes I do, of course, but MOST times I try to be intentional about what I’m writing and why.

For example, I journal:

  • 3 statements each for the prompts: “I forgive myself for…,” “I love myself for…,” I release myself to….” – “10 things I did right today….”
  • Alphabet Gratitude – I “number” a sheet of ruled paper from A to Z, with one letter per line. Then, I write something that I’m grateful for that begins with each letter of the alphabet. By the time I get to “T” I usually feel better. Coming up with “X” and “Z” will do it for sure. 😁
  • Inner Child Conversation – There’s a part of us that most adults don’t know to acknowledge. I used to think the concept of an “inner child” was woo woo nonsense. I am grateful however that I did my research and decided to be open and give it a try. I was surprised that it is legit. So how do you connect to your inner child? One technique I learned involves writing to your inner child with one hand and the responses with the other. So I write a question to my inner child with my dominant hand. (e.g. “Are you feeling sad?”) Then switch the pen to my non-dominant hand and allow the answer to flow from within. I don’t make it up. I sit and listen. And the words flow. (e.g. “Yes. Because….”) It is an amazing experience. If you are patient, and relax your skepticism a little, the responses really do flow. I know it’s legit because the answers that come through are not answers I would have thought of. There is a bypass that occurs when we switch to writing with our non-dominant hand that allows us to connect intuitively without our mind interrupting the communication. Just try it. I was skeptical, too. But it’s been very healing. (I’ll post a book in the comments/below that can support you in this if you have questions.)

❤️💜💙💚 CONNECT – I reach out (call, text, message…) a friend/family member/someone in my “tribe.”

  • I text a friend that I communicate with often and tell them I’m in a funk. The important part here is that I know which friends will meet me with compassion and encouragement, and which will meet me with a stern, “swift kick in the pants.” 😆You have to know which you need in the moment, and reach out accordingly.
  • I reach out to friends/family I haven’t heard from in a while. Sometimes the best way to feel better is to help someone else feel better. When we reach out to someone—not asking for anything, but just to let them know they’re on our my mind—that brief interaction can completely shift the energy of their day, and give us a boost, as well.

❤️💜💙💚 CREATE – I find a way to express myself that feels good. (The route needs to not cause hurt/harm to anyone else, lol.)

  • I create some form of visual art. I paint. I complete ceramic projects. I grab my gel pens and print a coloring page from a website for kids. I just find a way to create.
  • I write a song. Songwriting is my most natural gift. I sing all day, even when I’m unaware of it. So when I’m in a funk, sometimes I write a song in the moment to express how I’m feeling, or how I want to feel.
  • I write. Sometimes my blog posts are birthed out of those funky moments. Honestly this one began that way, lmao. I express myself via haiku. Haiku is poetry that requires three lines. The first and third lines are 5 syllables each and the middle line is 7 syllables. Expressing myself this way (which I do as another form of journaling) helps me express what’s bothering me when I can’t get the words out. It forces me to get to the point. Here’s an example:
Today, was just wack.
I had so much work to do.
All I did was sleep.

#Truestory Haiku helps me get it out without spending hours rehashing every detail. It’s a great way to release the day. You can just set a 10 minute timer and get it all out your system, then do something that feels good and go to bed with less on your mind. Works for me.

Hope these help! Have an amazing day, night, afternoon, etc.

Love and blessings!

Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist #Proud2BNaturalMe❤️💜💙💚

Published by Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist

Marlene Dillon is the CEO of MDillon Designs & Publishing. I teach girls to believe in themselves and choose relationships that support their goals. I teach children that their dreams are possible and that they are lovable. I teach parents to communicate with their children in healthy ways. In short, I.U.S.E. people. Inspire. Uplift. Support. Empower.

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