What are you setting free this year?
For me, I keep finding myself noticing the tendency to want to hide my truth, for fear of judgment. I’m realizing how much life I’ve given up trying to protect an image that technically means nothing to me. I’m releasing shame.
I think, honestly, a lot of shame is really centered in a fear of abuse. It’s not so much that the person feels bad about anything they’re doing. It’s more about the concern of being mistreated because of it, or ostracized, or called a “disappointment.”
So much of what it means to be a human is centered around belonging. And for those who have struggled with being treated as one who belongs, it’s often easier to hide than to stand boldly outside the box.
This year, I feel challenged to be more honest about who I am—to be one person no matter where I go. For the longest time I was a different person with every person I engaged with. I morphed to become who they needed me to be, or who I felt they expected me to be.
One thing that people often say about me is that I’m authentic. And I appreciate that because it truly is a work in progress and it’s beautiful to know that people see me in that way. It shows that I am doing the work to be fully me. And it is work.
I’m gathering my parts and pieces, and accepting that being a different person in every room is too exhausting. I don’t want to work that hard anymore. I am loving myself more this year. And one way that I’m doing that is by no longer hiding parts of me. I’d rather be fully me while you cover your eyes and ears.
With that said, I am doing something that is somewhat terrifying while fully exciting. This is something that I have been wanting to share for a while, and had intended to do it in 2020, and was setting up the details for it. Then, the world shut down.
It’s taken me a long time to get back to a place of considering doing it. I was setting up to offer private, group classes, but the 3 year hiatus strongly impacted my momentum.
I’m so grateful to my friend, fellow author, and gifted intimacy coach, Angie D. Lee for hearing my desire to move forward with this venture (I call Eggplant Goddess™)—an opportunity to empower women to feel more comfortable in the bedroom.
When I shared it with her, she was so encouraging and supportive. She offered me the opportunity to come on her podcast and I’m so grateful. This Friday, with her help, I’ll be bring my skills out the darkness and into the light.
As you must know by now, I am all about empowerment. That’s why I call myself Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist. I am particularly passionate about women’s empowerment. And that comes in many forms. One form is that I help women become comfortable pleasing their intimate partners. (Yep. I meant exactly what you think I meant. 😂) Many women are actually insecure in this area. I’m not. 😅 So, in private, I have supported many women to develop skills and confidence. But I’ve never shared this publicly.
I was going to be afraid that I would scare off my current audience or be looked at in a weird way (given that I’m also a children’s book author). But I’m so grateful for this community that I’ve created here, that constantly affirms me and lets me know that you all accept me as I am, and even encourage me to continue to be more authentic. And I thank you so much for your love and support. (I’m even cussing now. 😂 Primarily on my podcast since it still feels weird here. 😅)
It’s such a relief to be more myself—to expose more of me so I can be more of service. I am a complex individual, with a broad set of skills, passions, and interests. And I believe I get to use all of it for the greater good. I have held myself back for so long because of fear of judgment, fear of shame, …. for fear of losing support and ultimately love.
What I realize now is that by hiding myself and by not allowing myself to serve in all the ways that I was created to serve, I am losing so much more. I’ve made gods of people while denying the god that is within me.
There will always be people to judge and there will be trolls and people who criticize. There will be people who overestimate the value of their opinion, and I just have to make peace with that.
As scary as it is, I’m done dodging the criticism. For all I know it was never coming anyway. And honestly it just reveals which people are not aligned with me…..
So… I’m setting my good girl image free. She once was me. She served her time, but it’s a new season. Bye, innocent one. 🎈😘
This was a long ass post to basically say….. “On Friday, I’ll be joining my sistas on a podcast where we’ll be talking about s*x.” 😆 We’ll be addressing the shame and taboo topics, and the religious and societal influences. And we’ll be answering questions and sharing tips.
Thank you, again, Angie for allowing me to participate in your Girlfriends Chat.
Join us! This online event will be streaming live on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube. Be sure to RSVP at the link so that you are notified! https://fb.me/e/461bod2lp
Marlene Dillon Empowerment Specialist
MDillon Designs & Publishing 